Asanni Page 6

“I’m not just somebody. And all your logic aside, you would have made love to me, had I come in, you know that.”

  “So my virtue was saved because your gentlemanly side won the battle? Jack, I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow and slept all night. Didn’t even stir,” she said stubbornly.

  “You slept across the bed, you didn’t even touch the pillow.”

  “That was an expression.”

  “And you held my jacket. You fell asleep because you didn’t dare stay awake.”

  “My logical side won anyway, don’t you see?”

  “I don’t know about you, sweetheart, but I don’t feel like a winner,” Jack said and pulled out of the parking. “I’ll try to explain to you why I didn’t come to your room last night. Why I won’t try to convince you to forget about logic and reason, and let me take you to the nearest inn and make love to you.”

  “You’re still so sure I would go?”

  “I can be convincing.” He paused and sighed. “Astrid, I know that’s too fast for you, but please, trust me. Please. I won’t hurt you. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to do.”

  “What about you? Is this normal speed for you?”

  “I was a bit shocked, but now I’m fine. I know you need time. I said yesterday I wouldn’t rush you, and I won’t. I’ll try to adjust to your pace. But I’ll use these few weeks ahead of us, before I take you home, to court you, to make you fall in love with me. I’ll use all available means I can think of to make it happen. I’ll also try to get to know you better and give you a chance to get to know me better. You need to know who you’re falling in love with,” Jack said in a soft voice, pulling her closer and kissing the crown of her head. “Miss Spock, you don’t stand a chance.”

  “And when you take me to Red Cliffs? What then?”

  “I’ll wait until you’re ready. You are mine, Astrid. You might sense it, deep inside you might even know it, but for now take my word for it. I just can’t have you now. Not until you’re back home, not until you learn how to control your wolf. But you’re mine, and I’ll have you, no matter what. Did I scare you now?”

  “I’m not easily scared, Jack Canagan,” she said with a smirk. “It seems I’m left without a choice, but what the heck. It could’ve been worse!”

  Under any other circumstances, she knew she should be scared or at least angry. But everything was upside-down anyway, the usually clear borders between logical and irrational had become somehow much less defined. Defying any logic, hearing the simple fact that her heart belonged to that handsome man beside her, whom she’d met two days ago, gave her a sense of happiness that was not out of context at all.

  Jack made a soft chuckle. “You make me laugh and smile a lot, Astrid. You drive me crazy and you make me feel good, at the same time. You make me feel I’m at home whenever you’re near me... And Astrid, you’re not being left without choice. What I’m trying to say is that, believe me or not, I am going to be your choice.”

  “In other words, resistance is pointless.”

  Jack smiled at her and brushed her cheek with his knuckles. “I had the same thought two days ago. You’re right, Seven-of-Nine. Yes, it is, but I surrender gladly.”

  Chapter Ten

  Jack

  THAT NIGHT I told Astrid everything I could. About her parents, why she was so precious to us, and why her stepfather, who was behind those kidnapping attempts, wanted her so desperately for his clan. I knew I should have left it for James. I just couldn’t. All her life everybody had tried to shelter her by telling her half-truths, or not telling her anything at all. They’d waited until her first change to tell her about the magnitude of the danger she was in. They told her that her mother had remarried, but they didn’t tell her that she’d likely married her first husband’s killer.

  Seth Withali had also waited to see if Astrid, an asanni, would transform into a bleithast. Proof that she was a powerful, rare, precious Ellida, a female offspring of a wizard and a werewolf, a kind that combined the best attributes of both of her bloods. And when he was sure she was, he struck.

  “You say I’m Ellida? How do you know? You might be wrong, totally wrong.”

  “No, we’re not. Let me tell you more about it. Every clan wants an Ellida—a token of our ancient alliance with wizard kind—more than anything else,” I explained. “This is the greatest honor granted to a clan. Ellidas are above the pack hierarchy, they are the highest authority of a clan, with the power to overrule any Alpha’s decisions. The Ellida is the most treasured member of the clan because she brings prosperity, happiness and peace, and never abuses the power given to her.”

  Astrid closed her eyes, shaking her head. “Why does Seth want me? I don’t belong to his clan.”

  “In his madness, Seth had been obsessed with the idea of bringing an Ellida to his clan by any means. He wants to use you for his own goals: to get power to rule others, to conquer, to destroy. He believes Copper Ridge can claim you because you’re Rowena’s daughter. He doesn’t understand that an Ellida would never be a part of that insanity, simply because she couldn’t be. It would be an absolute contradiction to her nature.”

  “But Red Cliffs is sure I’m their Ellida?”

  “Our clan had two branches, one in Wales, in a place called Gelltydd Coch, which means red cliffs, and one here. Our first Ellida chose to stay in Wales with the original clan when several kinsmen decided to come to America, in 1708. They founded Red Cliffs, and they were soon joined by werewolves from other parts of Europe—”

  “But that means that you technically have an Ellida,” she interrupted. “You don’t need me.”

  “We are—how to say—an independent clan now. And you are the proof. After three hundred years, we’ve got our Ellida.”

  “What does Seth want to do with me? Keep me behind bars? He must know I would never comply. If he gets me—”

  “He will not get you, Astrid,” I said firmly.

  “He’ll try to blackmail me somehow into staying, right? Probably using my mother?”

  “Seth has a son, Darius, from his previous marriage. He wants you for his son, to bear him a sort of super child, who would combine his or her parents’ strength and power. We know almost nothing about Darius, except that he seems a decent fellow. I don’t think he has any role in his father’s insane scheming.”

  Astrid groaned and buried her head in her hands. “This is a nightmare... It’s the reason why I’ve had to avoid attention all my life. It’s why I can’t be a singer,” she said tiredly.

  She was right. Astrid’s grandparents had never told her exactly why she couldn’t be a singer. For a reason I couldn’t articulate, it seemed more unfair than any of all those half-truths she’d been told. Probably because of her beautiful dream to be the Queen of the Night. Or because of her question, spoken so softly: ‘Are you going to stick around long enough to hear me?’

  Well, I’d like to see somebody try to stop me.

  God, we had waited too long, we had left too much to pure luck: Arnaldur, Ella, her wizard kin, James, her werewolf family, I. Among all of us, Tristan and Livia had been her best bet. Her two vampire friends did their job better than any of us.

  “I am so sorry, Astrid. I hate that I had to tell you all this, but you have the right to know.”

  She sat with knees up and arms wrapped around her chest, as if she tried to protect herself from blow after blow that was coming from my side of the sofa. From time to time, she would shake her head. Her mind was looking for a grain of sanity in this madness.

  “I’d rather hear it from you than somebody else,” she said quietly. “That doesn’t mean that I’m not mad as hell at Ella and Arnaldur for keeping it from me. They’ve treated me like an incompetent child.”

  I wanted to reach for her, to take her in my arms and rock her gently, like a small child. I wanted to hold her hand and let her know I was there for her, but I kept myself on my side of the sofa, afraid that a single touch would shatter her.

  “
Jack, please hold me.” Her voice was low, and she sounded so tired and sad that I thought my heart would break.

  I moved in a blink and wrapped myself around her. Her whole body trembled, she was pale and breathed in shallow, fast gasps. She leaned her head against my chest. “I can hear your heart,” she whispered. “Nice, strong and a bit too fast.”

  “Maybe you should have a look at it one of these days. You are a doctor. Although, I think we know the reason.”

  “I want to sleep. Hold me, Jack. Don’t go,” she said in a thick voice. She lifted her head with a notable effort. In the soft light of the floor lamp her eyes looked strangely dark.

  “Sleep, Astrid. I won’t go anywhere.”

  “Jack, will James be angry with you for telling me this?”

  “Don’t worry, my love. Technically, I outrank him.”

  “Oh, I’m glad to hear that,” she said and closed her eyes.

  When her breathing became deep and regular, I pressed my back against her pink pillow on the sofa arm. Astrid stretched over me. She was warm and smelled good. I buried my head in her long, thick hair, that magnificent cascade of every possible shade from golden blond to rich, warm brown, lightened here and there with brilliant copper strings. “You’re the most beautiful asanni I’ve ever seen,” I whispered into that hair that smelled of strawberries and rain. “And you’ll be my queen.”

  I kissed her and held her tight, hoping my love would be strong enough to keep away the demons lurking in her dreams.

  Chapter Eleven

  A QUOTE she’d read somewhere long ago popped up in Astrid’s mind, waking her up.

  “What does your sorrow do while you are sleeping?”

  “It’s awake and waiting. And when it loses patience, it wakes me up.”

  It was that pitch-dark, long hour before dawn when she opened her eyes, stiff and sore, yet warm and safe in Jack’s arms, her head buried in the hollow at the base of his neck.

  Jack was awake as soon as she moved.

  Her first impulse was to pull away, but Jack’s body pinned under hers felt like home. How they’d ended up in that position was beyond her. What was the last thing she remembered? Feeling horrified, angry and sad. Desperately wanting Jack to come closer and hold her, to keep her whole.

  “Are you all right?” She heard his voice, thick with sleep, yet worried and alert.

  Heaviness had settled in her chest and she felt a painful knot in her belly, but the warm, solid body beneath her held her together.

  Jack’s arms tightened around her back in a strong, protective grip. “It will be all right, everything will be fine. I’m here and I won’t let anybody hurt you,” he whispered into her hair. “I’ll keep you safe.”

  He lay still, as if the slightest movement would disturb the fragile equilibrium they had established. She could feel his hard ridge through their clothes, the masculine scent of his arousal and her own sexual excitement.

  That’s what I need, a voice whispered in her head. I want him now, here. I need his light, his flesh. I need him to give me his strength to stop the darkness that threatens to swallow me.

  “I feel safe with you. I trust you,” she said in a throaty voice. Her hips moved, almost in invitation. “Jack?”

  A soft growl escaped from deep inside his chest. “Astrid...”

  “Jack, can I stay here? I need you.”

  “As long as you want.”

  “Just a bit longer. Until dawn. Darkness scares me sometimes,” she murmured. A few minutes later, her body relaxed and he could hear her deep breathing.

  BRACED ON her palms, Astrid lifted her torso. The pleasure of her middle part against Jack’s groin felt wonderful.

  Jack opened his eyes. The two blue slits glared at him from five inches above. His hand reached for a long gold-reddish lock and tucked it behind her ear.

  “How did we end up here?” she said.

  There was a bit of tension in her voice, but the expression on her face didn’t match it. She looked rather amused with arched eyebrows and a smile that curved her lips. The horror Jack had thrown at her last night was under control. Somehow, he sensed, she had conquered it.

  As if she could read his mind, Astrid said, “Jack, don’t feel terrible because you told me things that I needed to know long ago. I prefer to know. And if Seth is going to strike again, I better get ready for the battle, so to speak.”

  She reluctantly pulled herself away from him and moved to the opposite corner. “I’ll take a shower and you can make coffee.”

  “I see you don’t have a problem with giving orders. I’ll go the extra mile and make us breakfast, too. Omelette?”

  “Perfect. Please, no—”

  “Chives, I know.”

  “YOU ALL right?” Jack asked her again as they ate.

  “Uh-huh.” She jabbed a piece of bread in his general direction. “One of the advantages of having a logical and analytical mind is that when you are threatened for any reason, you immediately start looking for a solution. The first step is to conquer fear,” she said. “Fear, terror—they come from opposite sides of the emotional spectrum, they are probably there to keep the balance with the positive emotions. Conquer your fear and you’ll conquer your enemy... I’m talking nonsense, pay no attention.”

  “You’re doing great, given the circumstances.”

  As if she had an alternative, she thought. If she couldn’t change the fact that she was a werewolf, and that Ellida, whatever that was, then she would try to be the best werewolf and best Ellida. As she was the best doctor, and the best wizard with the skills she was given.

  And I’ll be damned if I’m going to be someone else’s mate and be forced to carry someone else’s child except Jack’s.

  The last thought came out of nowhere, as if somebody else had put it in her mind. Uncertain, she glanced in Jack’s direction and blushed. Her heart skipped a beat, but if Jack heard it, and she knew he could, he decided not to show it.

  “Jack, can your kind manipulate somebody else’s thoughts? Humans’, for example?”

  Jack smiled. “Well, we can often guess them, but normally we don’t mess with humans’ heads, except out of necessity. I’m not talking here about our humans that live among us. That’s different. If those outside our society become aware of what we are, or accidentally see us changing forms, we can modify their thoughts and alter or erase their memory. Unless they’re vardangaer. You’ve heard of them?”

  I nodded. “It means guardians. They’re said to be immune to our powers and magic, so we can’t hide from them. So they really exist? They always seemed to me more like a romantic myth.”

  “They do exist. They see things other humans can’t, but they are usually people of the highest moral standards and our secrets are safe with them. That’s why we call them guardians. I see them as the link between our kind and theirs. As a token of gratitude, vardangaer are offered the choice to become one of our kind. A werewolf or a vampire, that is. Since wizardry can be acquired only by birth, your kind grants them the access to your doctrine and secret knowledge, and those skills humans are capable of mastering.”

  “Have you even known a vardanni or a vardan? Those are the words for female and male guardians, right?”

  “Correct... No, I haven’t. They are very rare, or maybe they just rarely come in contact with us, so we think they are fewer than they in fact are.”

  “Okay, but what about the regular non-werewolves of Red Cliffs? They’re not vardangaer, but our secrets are safe with them nonetheless.”

  “The humans among us, of course know about us. We’re part of each other’s existence. Most marriages are mixed. Our humans are a bit different: they’re healthier and live far longer than average.”

  “But you have outside visitors, don’t you? You’re not a closed community.”

  “Not at all. We have lots of tourists and business partners. They don’t notice anything unusual. This is how it works. Even if someone is extra-perceptive, they can’t do us har
m on our territory and they don’t remember a thing as soon as they leave our boundaries.”

  That was good to know, Astrid thought. That explained a great deal about why werewolves so easily cohabited with humans, but it didn’t answer her question. Why did she think Jack was the father of her child?

  “And we have a few other tricks at our disposal,” Jack carried on, “like changing our appearance, to look older, or younger, or entirely different.”

  “Can any werewolf do that?”

  “Some of us can do it, some can’t. I can’t.”

  “So you cannot read or sense other peoples’ thoughts?” she probed again.

  “I can’t read them. I can sense a great deal, but it happens more through my nose than through my mind. And I’m talking about werewolves in general. Our skills vary from individual to individual, though. Why are you asking?”

  “I want to know more about you.”

  “Me, Jack, or us, werewolves?” he asked.

  She smiled. “Can’t you guess?”

  “Okay, then. What do you want to know about me?”

  “What is your position in Red Cliffs?”

  It was about him. Good. “I’m a crown prince.” He laughed. “The next Einhamir, I guess,” he added in a somber tone.

  “Einhamir is one of those archaic words that are still in use, isn’t it?”

  “Eigi Einhamir is how humans from Northern Europe called us long ago. It means ‘not of one skin’. We shortened it to Einhamir, and adopted it as the official title for a clan’s Alpha male. Einhamir sounds more… well, let’s say, less zoological than Alpha.”

  “What’s the official title of an Alpha female, then? Einhamira?”

  Jack rubbed his chin. “How about Einhamir’s beloved wife? There’s no official title for her, and please don’t be pissed off. She’s an Alpha female, that’s it.”

  Astrid pursed her lips let out a dry snort. “So, the female title is more zoological.”

  “Now I see that, too.”